Book Review

Book Review—Joey

June 10, 2018 by NZ Filbruns Leave a Comment

About the Book

Title: Joey
Author: Jennifer Marshall Bleakley
Genre: Inspirational, Memoir
Release Date: May 8, 2018
The heartwarming true story of a blind horse named Joey.

My thoughts:

A horse story for adults? This idea was quite intriguing to me when I read the sign-up information for Joey, so I looked into the book a bit farther. What I saw made me want to read the story. I was not disappointed—this is an incredible account!

The prologue is enough to draw you in, as a woman discovers a herd of horses dying of neglect and starvation. Although we are never told what happened to cause this, the book follows the life of one of the horses, Joey, an appaloosa, for the next several years. Because of the neglect, Joey was completely blind. Kim, who had recently founded an equine therapy ranch to help troubled children, took him under her wing—but would he be able to adjust to living in a new home, with a new companion, and be able to help children?

The account of the founding of Hope Reins, the ranch, which is in North Carolina, is very interesting. The story of how the ranch was founded and how God provided what was needed to build it and keep it going is interwoven with Joey’s story, as well as the stories of the people who volunteered there and cared for the horses.

I found it fascinating to read about the various solutions the staff of Hope Reins came up with to help Joey. I had never thought about what it would be like for a horse to go blind. It was also incredible to read about how he helped children who came into his life. I had never heard of equine therapy before, but it makes sense that hurting children would be helped by helping hurting animals. And, it wasn’t just children that found help and healing; some of the adult volunteers did, as well.

This is a book for horse lovers—but not just for horse lovers. This is also a book for anyone who likes to read about the different ways God works in people’s lives, and it is a book for people who care about hurting children. I highly recommend this true story.

I received a free copy of this book from the author; all opinions are my own.

The Author’s Synopsis:

At the height of his show career, this beautiful Appaloosa’s majestic stature, strength, and willingness to work made him the perfect partner. But when an injury cost Joey his show career, he moved from one owner to the next, ultimately experiencing severe abuse and neglect. A rescue group found Joey nearly dead from starvation—and blind.

Then he came to Hope Reins—a ranch dedicated to helping hurting kids who had been abused, emotionally wounded, or unwanted. By teaching these children to care for rescued animals, the Hope Reins staff were convinced they could reach kids with love and hope and show them that we are never forgotten by God.

But could the financially struggling ranch afford to take care of a blind horse that no one else wanted? Could Joey somehow learn to trust people even though the world had hurt him so badly? And what would happen—to Joey, the kids, and Hope Reins—if they failed?

A true story of friendship destined to become a classic, Joey will touch your heart and reveal the power of finding light in the darkness.

More Information About This Book:

When a blind horse named Joey meets a struggling ranch owner dedicated to helping troubled kids, the result is a story of friendship, faith, and overcoming–and ultimately, a tale of how God always cares for the cast aside and uses them for His glory.
Joey is an inspirational memoir-like read that delights readers with a story about finding healing and restoration in the unlikeliest of places.
What a blind horse can teach you about overcoming your past and living fully in the life God has called you to have.
An unlikely story of God using a blind horse to bring healing and restoration to hurting children.
A percentage of the author’s proceeds from her book, Joey, will go to supporting Hope Reins which pairs hurting kids with rescued horses.
God said “you’re worthy” when the world said “you’re worthless.” Joey, an inspiriting story of finding healing and restoration in the unlikeliest of places.
The Hope Reins ranch set out to save these horses, but in the end, the horses saved them.
How the story of Joey saved the ranch… and taught the most valuable lesson.
Joey… your family’s next read
Let God wake you up to life lessons learned in unexpected places!

About the Author:

Jennifer Bleakley graduated from Florida Southern College with a degree in biology and was planning to apply for medical school when her best friend’s father died of pancreatic cancer. Walking through that experience with a family she had loved for so long left a permanent mark on her heart, and she soon realized that God was calling her to stand alongside other families facing similar heartbreak and loss. Jennifer earned a master’s degree in counseling from Nova Southeastern University and began working at the local hospice in St. Petersburg, Florida, as a child and family grief counselor. It was a job she loved deeply and one she continued doing until she and her husband started a family.

When her husband’s job required the family to relocate to Raleigh, North Carolina, God began awakening in Jennifer a long-forgotten passion for writing. She began journaling—recording evidences of God’s hand at work in her new season of motherhood. Her journal morphed into a blog, and she still writes regularly about glimpsing God’s grace in her daily life at jenniferbleakley.com.
Jennifer now writes curriculum and devotionals for her local church, is a contributing author for Treasuring Christ curriculum and She Believes online Bible studies, and leads a community women’s Bible study. She loves introducing children at her church and in the community to Jesus, helping them discover his goodness. Even though she once asserted she was much too introverted to be a public speaker, Jennifer has found that God’s grace is big enough even for lifelong introverts, and she now delights in speaking to audiences about his extraordinary grace at work in our ordinary lives.

Guest Post From Jennifer Bleakley:

One October evening I stared into the eyes of the most unusual looking horse I had ever seen—his black and white spotted coat resembled that of a Dalmatian; his soft pink lips were chewing at some invisible morsel; and his charcoal eyes seemed to peer into my very soul.

And although I’m not what anyone would describe as a horse person, I was completely captivated by this horse.

I inched closer to him, compelled forward by some unseen force, until only a thin rail separated us. He stared at me. I smiled. Can a horse register a human smile? I had no idea, but I smiled anyway. The founder of the horse ranch was telling our small group about the ministry she had started—a ministry that pairs rescued horses with hurting children to help them find true hope and real healing. I listened to her words, but my eyes never moved from the horse. He looked at me as if he could read my every thought. As if he knew exactly why I was at the ranch that night. That I had been feeling a bit lost, struggling to find myself—my calling—in the midst of a new season of life. That I was on this tour in the hopes that I might find answers here—maybe even a purpose.

He bent his head toward the railing just inches from my resting hand. His eyes now level with my own, the setting sun reflecting brilliant hues in the depths of his eyes.

How beautiful, I whispered as my fingers reached toward him.

“And our Joey here is completely blind…” I heard the woman say. “He was a former champion…injured…sold…abused…abandoned….

The fragmented sentence floated around the picturesque scene, but the words just didn’t make sense. Surely the woman wasn’t talking about this horse? Not the one who could see into my soul. Not the black and white beauty who knew all my secrets with just one look?

The woman handed Joey a carrot. His greedy lips taking the treat from her hand, leaving it free to scratch him behind the ear.

“But Joey was rescued and now he lives here,” she continued, “Where every day his determination and blind faith, point hurting kids to hope. Kids who have also known abuse and abandonment. Kids who see Joey choosing to live, choosing to learn, choosing to trust, and realize that maybe, just maybe they can too.”

Tears flowed down my face as I watched the horse nuzzle the woman’s hand. A blind horse leading people to see hope. The phrase swirled around my mind, before settling in my heart.

I had gone to the ranch that day looking for a purpose. Thinking that I could volunteer—use my long forgotten counseling degree in some way. Thinking that time spent here would ease the transition from full-time mommy to mother of school-age children. However, days after meeting the horse his eyes still haunted me. His story still captivated me. And so in spite of knowing very little about horses, and having never attempted anything like writing a book before, I sat down to write about a horse named Joey. A blind horse who was helping me find my way home….

Click here to purchase your copy.

Book Review—Love, Amy

April 27, 2018 by NZ Filbruns 3 Comments

About the Book

Title: Love, Amy
Author: Amy Young
Genre: Memoir
Release Date: June, 2017

My Thoughts:

I really enjoyed Love, Amy! It is quite an unusual book, but a great one. Amy Young subtitled her book, An accidental memoir told in newsletters from China. She compiled ten years’ worth of the newsletters she wrote from China, with tips for people who write newsletters after each year. I found these tips very interesting, as well as the letters themselves.

Amy went to China in 1995 to teach teachers how to teach English. Her first newsletter talked about some of the challenges she would be facing as she anticipated her upcoming move. After that, most of her letters, except for a few in the summers, told about the events of her life. She has some very funny stories, such as the frequent battles with mice, as well as some very sober accounts. She was privileged to see a number of people come to faith in Jesus, and endured a serious health crisis.

You will learn a lot of very interesting trivia about China as you read these letters. For example, at least in the mid 90’s, buildings in Shanghai were unheated even though the weather was quite cold! Also at that time, if a person in charge of directing bicycle traffic found you guilty of some minor infraction, they could either fine you, or worse, make you wave the red flag for 30 minutes to stop traffic!

I appreciated some of the lessons Amy learned. One time a man grossly insulted her. She couldn’t sleep that night until she truly forgave him. She also had to learn to surrender to “the daily crosses in my life.” Her thoughts about that were quite challenging. I found her observations about Tibetan Lamaism quite interesting, as well. She said it is a very dark evil.

I highly recommend this book for anyone who is interested in missions, especially to China. Also, if you find yourself needing to write newsletters to financial or prayer supporters, Amy’s tips are invaluable. I don’t know if they’ll make any difference in the way I write ours, since I do it a different way, but she has some very good pointers.

I received a copy of this book as a gift from the author. I was not required to write a positive review, and all opinions given here are my own.

I received a copy of this book as a gift from the author. I was not required to write a positive review, and all opinions given here are my own.

The Author’s Synopsis:

She came to China with a lesson plan. What she found was a new sense of purpose.

Amy Young traveled to China in the mid 1990s to teach English to educators. But she never expected the profound way they would enrich her soul. With the influence of the enchanting country and its extraordinary everyday people, Amy extended a two-year assignment to nearly two decades far away from home.

Starting shortly after her arrival, Amy shared her stories and her unique perspective through a series of letters. Her nine years of correspondence demonstrated a country going through growing pains: from political unrest to the SARS epidemic to budding prosperity. Amy battled language barriers, cultural faux pas, and invasive mice with nothing to lose. She even fought for her life with a potentially deadly illness, unsure if she’d survive to share her tale.

Throughout her journey, Amy drew strength from God and came to appreciate the beauty and power of an ordinary life lived well.Love, Amy: An Accidental Memoir Told in Newsletters from China is one woman’s deeply moving journey of self-transformation. If you like humorous anecdotes, immersions in Eastern culture, and honest stories that aren’t afraid to dig deep, then you’ll love Amy Young’s heartfelt tale.

About the Author:

Amy Young is a writer, speaker, and advocate for embracing the messy middle of your one glorious life. Author of Looming Transitions, Twenty Two Activities for Families in Transition, and The Looming Transitions Workbook, she also created the blog The Messy Middle (www.messymiddle.com), has been a part of Velvet Ashes, (an online community for missionaries) from the beginning, and contributes regularly to A Life Overseas. Amy enjoys nothing more than being with her people, wherever they are in the world. She also enjoys cheering on the Denver Broncos and Kansas Jayhawks. After nearly twenty years in China, she returned to Denver and much to her shock, discovered she enjoys gardening.

Guest Post from Amy Young:

The tug for a life that is “Anything but Boring”

When I was in college the Hallmark Hall of Fame movie Sarah Plain and Tall changed my life. You’ve probably seen it and been moved too. Sarah, a spinster by the standard of her day, moves from Boston to the fields of Kansas to consider marrying a widower and help him raise his children and work his farm. Her brother could not understand why Sarah would move from so-called civilization to the middle of nowhere. But the longing she felt for her life to matter resonated deeply with me.

I was in the liminal space between adolescence and adulthood. Like Sarah, I knew I could stay where I was and live a good life, but I wanted more. And so I moved to China.

Our world is one that loves big, change-the-world stories. I love them too. I remember reading The End of the Spear, the story of Jim Elliott and his friends who were martyred for their faith. I also lost myself in the stories of Gladys Aylward, William Carey, Lottie Moon, and Amy Carmichael. I remember reading about a missionary that had some worm pulled out of his stomach that was the size of a large snake. Disgusting! Fascinating! All for the gospel! The life of faith was exciting and God was on the move all the time! While it is true, the life of faith is exciting and God is on the move, it is also ordinary, boring, disappointing, and confusing. When I started compiling the letters I wrote from my days in China, I was embarrassed by what “first year Amy” said. She was so clueless, so uninformed, so willing to display her lack of cultural knowledge. I wanted to put my hand over her mouth and ask her to please pipe down because she did not really believe what she was saying. But she did, “first year Amy” could not know what “fifteen year in China Amy” knew.

These change the world stories I love? Turns out they have been more sanitized than I realized without showing the cultural and ministry progression that must have taken place.

Even now, knowing what I know, part of me wishes my newsletters contained miracles and throngs coming to Christ because of my work. I thought throngs and miracles were what a “real” cross-cultural worker would do. I thought that would show that my life mattered, like Sarah’s when she moved to Kansas. Don’t we all want our lives to matter? I believed that mattering was measurable. By compiling and writing this book the lesson Love, Amy has taught me is that too often we confuse size with significance. I still hear the whisper that says, “Amy, really? You wrote about the cultural beliefs that influence standing in line and you think that is worth people giving of their prayer, money, and time?” Part of me is reluctant even now to publish these letters because they are common. In truth, I am happy with my life and the contributions I have made. Of course I have regrets and wish I’d handled certain situations differently. But if all we hear are the spectacular stories, we can miss the gift our beautifully ordinary lives can be.

Who made it into the Gospels? A widow and her two mites. A boy and his few fish. She is described as offering out of her poverty. His common lunch was used to feed more than he could have imagined. Jesus did not tend to elevate those in power or those who seemed impressive.

My first year, a fellow teacher in China told me, “You’re lucky you’re still in your first year. Wait until your second year and you have told all your stories. You’ll have nothing to say in your newsletters.” Isn’t that the heart of what we fear—that we will have nothing to say with our lives? The secret to combating this fear is not that secretive. Show up and be present. Taken individually, these letters don’t add up to much, but put them together and much to my surprise, month after month I wrote an accidental memoir.

As ordinary as it is, I do have to say, life in China was anything but boring! If you love memoirs and want to hear stories that will make you laugh or cringe (and sometimes both), join me on a college campus in China.

Click here to purchase your copy.

Product Review—Carole P. Roman

March 27, 2018 by NZ Filbruns Leave a Comment

Most of the time, when I review a product, it is digital. That makes the rare occasions when we are sent a physical copy of something quite special! Our most recent review is one of those; we were sent three books from the Carole P. Roman books and collections. Out of a long list of possible titles, I chose two about American history and one about Kenya. As soon as the books arrived in this house, they were being read—and reread! A couple of weeks later, Little Miss is still loving them!

I had never seen any books by Carole P. Roman before, so I enjoyed being introduced to some great new resources for our family. These are lavishly illustrated books, with text on one side of each two-page spread and a picture on the other. Many of the illustrations are full-color drawings; some I noticed were drawings inserted into a photograph. I liked all of them!

The first book I chose is If You Were Me and Lived In…Colonial America. Through the eyes of a young boy, this book tells about the reasons that the Pilgrims wanted to move to America. You will imagine traveling on the Mayflower, and surviving the hardships of the first winter in the New World. The main events of that time are touched on, but the main emphasis is on daily life. We are learning about Jamestown right now, and will be studying the Pilgrims next, so this book was a good fit.

The second book I chose was If You Were Me and Lived in…The American West. I chose this one because of our study of American History, although it will be a good while until we reach the Oregon Trail. This book mainly describes living conditions on the trail, as if you were a child traveling in a wagon train. A number of the pictures appear to be photographs of a scene, with pioneers, or covered wagons, or a log cabin, added. I really like the effect this creates. One detail I did have a question about was the dates given; the child in this story traveled in “The Great Migration of 1843”, after a relative who had gone to California for gold told the child’s parents about Oregon.

Our last book is If You Were Me and Lived In…Kenya. I chose this one because we have friends who were missionaries in Kenya for several years. I found this brief introduction to the people and country of Kenya to be very interesting. Several words and names that are commonly used in that country are included; thankfully, the pronunciations are given! Foods and games are introduced, as well as wildlife and an annual celebration. My boys did notice in one of the pictures that the children were not holding the cricket bat the same way they do when they play; they said their friend who is a cricket fanatic would have a fit if he saw that picture! Otherwise, I thought the book was accurate.

I wouldn’t mind having more of these lovely picture books on our shelf for reference. They are a good supplement to history and geography, and Little Miss loves just looking at them; in fact, I had to get one back from her to check on something just now as I was writing this review! She has the two history books with her at the moment and is making up a story to go with the pictures. In fact, she just informed me that she can read some of the words! In the Colonial America book, there is a picture of a boy holding a lobster. Her interpretation of the text beside it? “A spider is getting a boy to eat.” Maybe these books are good for developing imagination, as well as imparting information?!

One more thing…I noticed this afternoon a note in the back of the Colonial America book that there are additional resources available on the author’s blog. I took a quick look at what was available for the books we have. There wasn’t a lot yet, but for each of our two history books there were a couple of pages of study questions. The books are great on their own for younger children; the questions would help with creating a mini unit study for older children.

Book Review—Fine Print

March 12, 2018 by NZ Filbruns Leave a Comment

About the Book

Name of book: Fine Print, book 3 in the Meddlin’ Madeline series
Author: Chautona Havig
Genre: Historical, Mystery
Release Date: March 15, 2018

My Thoughts:
I’ve been enjoying the saga of Madeline Brown ever since the first book came out a couple of years ago. In Fine Print, she is back again, investigating another mystery—but with a twist this time. Previously, she saw things that made her curious about something, and started investigating a man’s character on her own. Now, Edward Gastrel has asked her to investigate something for him—not someone’s character this time, but a mystery his grandfather left for him.

Madeline first met Edward at a dinner party. He had heard her reputation, and tested her out with a riddle; when she answered it quickly, he asked her to help him solve the riddle in his grandfather’s will—if he couldn’t find the solution, he would not get most of his inheritance. Of course, Madeline couldn’t resist such a challenge—but what would she find? You may be as surprised as she was, in the end, but you’ll have to read to the last chapter for all the pieces to fall into place. Until then, it’s somewhat vague.

I was challenged along with Madeline as she saw how absorbed Russell was by the Bible. The advice he gave her is worthwhile for everyone! I’m appreciating the spiritual growth I’m seeing in her life from book to book in this series.

Madeline’s skills as a detective are definitely growing, from one book to another. I’m enjoying following her progress—and the next book is sounding quite interesting, too, if it continues on where this one left off! I’m looking forward to seeing what happens with Jimmy and Essie, two poor children Madeline has learned to know, as well.

I received an advance reader’s copy from the author and chose to write this review. Links in this post may be affiliate links, which will benefit Esther if you chose to buy through them.

The Author’s Synopsis:

Budding detective, Miss Madeline Brown, has gained quite the reputation for “meddling” in the circa 1900 city of Rockland. With two successful “cases” under her belt, it was only a matter of time before she found something new to interest her insatiable curiosity.

This time, however, the “curiosity” found her.

Challenged by Edward Gastrel, to prove her deductive prowess, Madeline embarks on riddling out the puzzle of a journal left to him by his grandfather. If she can decode the contents, the local gentleman may find himself in the possession of something quite valuable.

As usual, however, things aren’t as they seem, and Madeline finds herself in a race against more than time and ambiguity.

About the Author:
Chautona Havig lives and writes in California’s Mojave Desert where she uses story to point readers to the Master Storyteller.

Guest Post from Chautona Havig

Denny’s. “America’s Diner.” It’s also my “office away from my office away from home.” Most nights I write at our local prayer house. But on Wednesday nights for a few hours, and then all night on Saturday, I sit in booth 14 and write.

It was a cold, frosty Wednesday night. With thoughts from Bible Study still swirling in my mind and heart, I ordered my loaded baked potato soup and began brainstorming with my writing and podcasting buddy, April.

She left around midnightish—as usual. And another evening regular began chatting.

Look. I like this guy. He’s a fascinating conversationalist. We have a lot of fun talking books, movies, politics, history, computers… He’s even given me a great idea for a book (without meaning to, but still).

But… that night, I needed to get a bunch done on Madeline and didn’t have time for chatting. So, when he started talking about his evening, I wanted to bang my head on the table. I kept repeating, “People are more important. People are more important. People are more important,” over and over in my head.

I can’t tell you how often this has happened at Denny’s. Employees stop to chat. Regular diners stop to chat. This guy starts a long conversation and always on nights I can’t afford to spend… chatting!

But everything shifted in an instant.

The man said something—what, I can’t remember—and my brain started churning.

I asked a question.

He answered.

The next thing I knew, he’d moved into my booth and began firing questions at me. Suggestions. Most of what he suggested wouldn’t work with the story, but he had no way of knowing that. Still, every time he did I got a new idea. And I’d ask a question. He’d answer, suggest. I’d counter—ask or answer. Ideas blossomed and exploded into seeds of even more ideas.

And right there, at two o’clock in the morning, with Angela the wonder server keeping me in fresh glasses of Coke, Fine Print went from not only my favorite of the Madelines (thus far) but also became much more exciting.

The whole thing taught me a couple of lessons. First, I always say that people are more important than the “stuff” I do. Sometimes, that’s not so easy to live. But the Lord is always faithful, like He did that night, to remind me that it sometimes helps me, too.

Second, sometimes a mid-book brainstorming session is just what I need to keep my excitement high. And, if that means a “wasted” Wednesday night in booth 14, then I’d say it’s worth it.

Click here to purchase your copy.

Book Review—Exploring Creation With Astronomy

December 6, 2017 by NZ Filbruns Leave a Comment

We just finished science for the 2017 school year. This is the fourth year in a row that we have used Apologia’s Elementary science, and we’re still loving it. This year, we used Exploring Creation With Astronomy. I thought Jeanne Fulbright wrote great books before—but in this 2^nd Edition she outdid herself! This was a very fascinating course. I’m glad I decided to buy the new book instead of borrowing the old one from a friend.

Since our school year began in February, we have traveled through the solar system and beyond. We began with a quick overview of astronomy and the solar system, and then took more in-depth looks at the Sun and each planet, as well as the moon. There was also a chapter on Space Rocks, tucked in between Mars and Jupiter. The section about the Asteroid Belt was especially fascinating to me; the hypothesis presented for the existence of the asteroids sure made sense to us! The second-to-last chapter was also very fascinating for me, as it presented information that has been discovered recently, so it was all new for me. I think it’s rather sad that Pluto has been downgraded to a dwarf planet, but it was very interesting to learn about such things. The Kuiper Belt, too, was new to me—and so interesting! The last chapter talked about stars and space travel.

As we have done before, I bought the notebooking journals to use with the textbook. We get a lot more out of the course by using these workbooks. Every day as we read, the boys narrate a sentence or two (or more, if they enjoyed the section) about what they learned, and there are activities to do as you go through each of the chapters. Each chapter has anywhere from one to three minibooks to make, to help with review, and there is also a vocabulary activity. We liked the way the 2nd edition notebooking journal was laid out much better than the others we have used. Instead of having to find the pages for the minibooks in the back, they were right in each lesson, where we needed them. Also, these activities were interspersed with other things in the lesson, rather than always at the end. The book was a bit more attractive, too.

We didn’t do all the activities, but some that we did were great fun. Probably the most memorable was the time we made a “scale model” of the distances in the solar system if the sun were the size of a dime—so incredible!

As always, I highly recommend Apologia’s science! We love that God and His Word are honored all the way through, and we enjoy the very interesting way in which facts are presented.

You can see pictures of a couple of our projects from this course here and here.

Book Review—Beauty From Ashes

November 27, 2017 by NZ Filbruns 2 Comments

About the Book

Name of book: Beauty from Ashes
Author: Alana Terry
Genre: Christian Women’s Lit
Release Date: July, 2017

My Thoughts:
I read a book by Alana Terry a year or two ago and found it excellent. I’ve been seeing her name lately, so when I was offered the opportunity to review her new book, Beauty From Ashes, I decided it sounded like a good story. I was not wrong—this is an excellent book.

Tiff tells her story in this book, starting with being in church for the first time in years. Her husband, Jake, took her there, and she went because she didn’t have the energy to argue about it. She gets the surprise of her life when an old woman stands up to pray—and suddenly, Tiff is given hope for her tiny baby, Natalie, who spent her first month in NICU because of a brain bleed. Natalie doesn’t respond to anything, has never cried, and can’t even swallow her own saliva. What will become of her? And what will become of Jake and Tiff, as Jake’s mother, whose marriages both ended in divorce, has moved in with them and taken over care of the baby? Can Jake and Tiff manage to stay together, or will their lifelong patterns continue to cause relationship problems?

I found the writing style unique; Tiff tells her story in first-person present tense, with constant flashbacks to fill in the backstory. These flashbacks are not annoying, but done very well, as Tiff thinks about her past and tries to figure out her present. I absolutely loved the growth I saw in her life during the short span of time covered in this fairly long book, and rooted for her every step of the way. It was never obvious, however, what would happen: Would Natalie live or die? Would Tiff walk out on Jake or stick with him? And what about Jake? Would he stick with Tiff, or be influenced too much by his mother? This is not a happily ever after story; it is a realistic story. I loved it, though. One of my favorite scenes is Grandma Lucy’s celebration of life. I couldn’t believe what happened there—such a great touch.

I found Beauty From Ashes a very refreshing change of pace from most women’s fiction. Women’s fiction is mostly romances, where a strong, wonderful man sweeps a woman off her feet and somehow solves all her problems. This book, on the other hand, has as characters a weak, vulnerable woman and a man vacillating between what is right and what he’s always known and done. And in the middle of it all, God is working.

One thing that makes this book very real is the fact that the author is writing from experience. She had a baby in NICU for the same reason that Natalie was in there. Tiff’s feelings are portrayed so clearly—this is the author speaking from her heart. Don’t read this book if you want a story to make you feel good; read it if you want reality.

I received a copy of this book as a gift from the author, but was under no obligation to write a positive review.

WARNING: Many times, Tiff mentions having had boyfriends in her bedroom as a teenager, or being in a vehicle with them. These scenes are never described explicitly, but you know what was going on. Also, Jake admits once to cheating on her.

The Author’s Synopsis:
A baby was never part of Tiff’s plans. Especially not a sick baby in a NICU, struggling for life on a ventilator.

As days in the hospital turn to weeks, Tiff grows more and more convinced that God is punishing her for turning her back on him so many years ago. Or is it possible he’s working in the midst of her daughter’s bleak prognosis to draw Tiff back to himself once more?

The Orchard Grove Christian Women’s Fiction books are standalone literary novels about real-life believers facing real-life struggles. You won’t meet perfect saints whose lives are faultless models of the Christian faith. Instead, you’ll meet a perfect God whose plans of redemption are far more glorious than what the mortal mind could ever imagine.

About the Author:
Alana is a pastor’s wife, homeschooling mom, self-diagnosed chicken lady, and Christian suspense author. Her novels have won awards from Women of Faith, Book Club Network, Grace Awards, Readers’ Favorite, and more. Alana’s passion for social justice, human rights, and religious freedom shines through her writing, and her books are known for raising tough questions without preaching. She and her family live in rural Alaska where the northern lights in the winter and midnight sun in the summer make hauling water, surviving the annual mosquito apocalypse, and cleaning goat stalls in negative forty degrees worth every second.

Guest Post from Alana Terry:

Click here to see the special video message from Alana.

“You better come in,” I told my husband. “The doctors don’t think he’s going to make it.”

Not the kind of conversation you want to have with anyone at one o’clock in the morning. I was spending the night at the hospital with our nine-month-old baby Silas and hadn’t left the hospital complex in days. Scott was home with our toddler trying to get some sleep.

And our son Silas was dying.

Raising a medically-fragile baby changed me like nothing else ever has. Thankfully, Silas pulled through that horrific evening, but that didn’t mean life was sugar and cream from then on.

As anyone with experience knows, it’s hard work being a special-needs mom.

And it can devastate a marriage.

Thankfully, God brought my husband and me through those nearly impossible first few years while Silas was in and out of the hospital with no guarantee of his survival.

And he continued to sustain us through even more years of therapy, hospital visits, and medical tests.

And now we have a happy marriage, a healthy boy, and hearts full of gratitude for all God’s done for us.

But I never want to forget where we were.

The depths God delivered us out of.

The despair that would have overwhelmed us if God hadn’t been our strength and our support.

Writing Beauty from Ashes was one way to remind myself of those difficulties God brought us through. It’s not strictly autobiographical, but the baby in this novel went through a very similar traumatic birth experience as Silas did, and all the health issues — including that night in the hospital when I truly thought we were going to lose our baby — are based on the trials we went through when Silas was young.

I wrote Beauty from Ashes because we all need to be reminded every now and then that even though life can be impossibly hard, even though there’s no guarantee our children will grow up and love Christ and make good choices with their lives or even survive until adulthood at all, God is good, and he will sustain us through all the trials we have to endure.

I think that’s why Beauty from Ashes resonates so much with Christian readers hungry for more than a simple story with a happily-ever-after ending, like these readers:

“…by far some of the best Christian fiction I’ve read.” Amy L, author

” … a story that is both heart-wrenching and heartwarming.” ~ Jaime Hampton, award-winning author of Malnourished

“I didn’t think it was possible that the author could write any better than she already does … This is a book I will never forget … She writes with realism and doesn’t pull any punches … Every time I read a book from this author, my faith grows.” Deana at Texas Bookaholic

I hope you’ll take a chance to grab your own copy of Beauty from Ashes today, and don’t forget to watch the video and enter to win the $100 gift card to christianbooks.com.

Because Christian fiction should encourage, edify, and inspire.

And because God is big enough to carry all our burdens.

Click here to purchase your copy.

Book Review—Will Not See

August 30, 2017 by NZ Filbruns Leave a Comment

About the Book

Book title: Will Not See
Author: Chautona Havig
Release date: August 29, 2017
Genre: Christian Fiction / contemporary / suspense (light)

My Thoughts:

Whew, what a book! Most of the time anymore, I am able to exercise self-discipline with books, and put them down when I need to get on with helping someone with school, or cooking a meal, or whatever needs to be done. This one, though— I was almost glad that I needed to be resting, recuperating from recent trauma, when Will Not See came in to be reviewed! I literally read it in one day. Not quite one session, because I had to stop for meals and reading to the children and a few other things, but I devoured the last half of the book in one go.

Imagine waking up in a motel room, not knowing who you are. The identification in her purse said she was Victoria Jeffries—but where did she live? What did she do for a living? Who did she know? Victoria had no clue. She could not remember anything at all.

Enter Ella Weeks—main character in None So Blind. She had experienced much the same loss of memory less than a year earlier. After going to the hospital to talk to Victoria, she helped the young woman go back home and provided support as she tried to figure out her life. But when strange, menacing men started coming around and threatening Vikki, as she soon became known, how could the women deal with that? What were the men wanting, anyway? What had Vikki been into before this happened?

Will Not See is quite different from None So Blind. Besides the story of the memory loss, and having to rebuild her life, Vikki’s story has a crime mystery woven in. That’s why I couldn’t put it down: I had to find out if she would be all right or not. As always in Chautona’s books, though, I found gems that I loved. One was a quote from Ella’s husband, “But remember Who is really in control. All our little attempts to make everything go to our plans are illusions we give ourselves when we take our eyes off the Lord.”

Bottom line? I thoroughly enjoyed Will Not See, and will probably read it again soon—more slowly, to get more out of it, and I can hardly wait for the third book in the series. Somehow, we have to get to the bottom of what is causing these losses of memory—is it a strange virus, a drug that the victims have somehow inadvertently taken, or some weird scientist’s experiment, or something else altogether? I want to know!

WARNING: Prostitution is mentioned a few times, in passing, and Vikki was raped as a young girl. There is nothing explicit.

The Author’s Synopsis:

When Vikki Jeffries wakes up in a Rockland hotel with no idea of who she is and why she can’t remember…well, anything, the Rockland medical community begins to take a closer look at what may have happened to cause a second case of inexplicable amnesia. But for Vikki, this is more than a medical anomaly. It’s her life. What is she doing in Rockland, thousands of miles away from her home in Apache Junction, Arizona? Who is she? Why is no one looking for her? Or are they?

The secrets of a past she’s discovering she doesn’t want to know lay locked away in a memory that refuses to acknowledge their existence.

When Brandon Marana finds his neighbor struggling to open her front door, his quiet life becomes a race to protect Vikki and himself from people who are determined to find her. He’s falling in love with her–but he shouldn’t. He’s a Christian. She’s not. But the more she depends on him to know who she is and learn why these things keep happening to her, the stronger those ties become.

About the Author:

Chautona Havig lives and writes in California’s Mojave Desert with her husbnd and five of her nine children. Through her novels, she hopes to encourage Christians in their walk with Jesus.

Guest post from Chautona Havig:

The circle of death swirls on the screen and it shifts. The bank balance appears, and with it, my heart sinks. It’s been a tough few months, financially. The bottom line proves it.

My reaction? Inhale. Exhale. “Okay, now we know the worst. We can do something about it.”

My husband, on the other hand, suffers a definite blow. Kevin might not sleep that night. Instead, he’ll mull over what we could have done differently, how we can make changes, if he’s a failure at this thing called life. He’ll pray—for hours.

They say ignorance is bliss. And sometimes, that’s true. It’s also a personality thing, I think. I tend to be a “let me have your worst”kind of gal. But when the negative arrives, I also tend to want to shield Kevin from it all. I don’t know how he can worry so much. He can’t fathom how I can turn it off.

But sometimes those personality things go deeper—into what can be serious faults. It has been said, “There are none so blind as those who will not see. The most deluded people are those who choose to ignore what they already know.”

Or, in the words of Jeremiah, “Now hear this, O foolish and senseless people, who have eyes but do not see, who have ears but do not hear.”

What does this have to do with not seeing?

As I work on the Sight Unseen series, one recurring theme happens, of course. Memory loss—the removal of all insight into one’s past. You can hear who you were, be informed of what you did and why others think you did it, but you can’t know your own self the way you once did. It’s a fresh slate, and it can be a good thing in some respects.

Those around you can now see the difference between habits and personality traits—true dislikes and those conditioned by life. What might have been a fear once could be gone if the cause of that fear is blotted out.

But even for these fictional characters, truth doesn’t change. In None So Blind,Ella takes her memory loss and uses it as an opportunity to reinvent herself,if you will. And you know what? If you asked her family about it, they’d tell you that it fits her personality. That take-charge, gotta get ’er done attitude Dani may have used in different ways, but both “manifestations”of the woman had those qualities. Sure, Ella’s was tempered by recent experience, but not much.

Vikki Jeffries, is almost the antithesis of Ella in that respect.

The past is in the past. It scares her. Is it because she doesn’t know it? Because she’s frightened by the unknown? We don’t know. But what we do know is anything associated with that past, even the few very personal items she finds, she rejects. It’s as if ignorance of them will protect her from them. Where Ella runs to face her problems, Vikki runs from them.

But despite those differences, I find it interesting that both women did the same thing, basically—just at different times.

Before her “episode,”Ella chose to blind herself to her faults. She knew them. Lived with them daily, but couldn’t face or address them. So, she “refused to see.”

Vikki—we don’t know. But I think the story shows that she couldn’t blind herself to truth before her episode. As much as she might have ached to, she just couldn’t. Now that the opportunity is here, however, she grasps it and if she insists on squeezing her eyes shut indefinitely, it may cost her everything—her life. Her soul.

Philippians 4:8, “…whatever is true.”

They say ignorance is bliss. Well, “they”also say, “Truth hurts.”And sometimes it does. But so do the consequences of that ignorance. I guess the next time the bank balance dips low, I won’tbe handling the fallout alone. Then again, one can always pray that it doesn’t dip low! I think we’ll start there.

Click here to purchase your copy.

Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from the author for my honest review, which I have given. I was not required to write a positive review and have not been compensated for it in any way. All opinions expressed are my own.

Book Review—Wounded in the Church

August 8, 2017 by NZ Filbruns Leave a Comment

About the Book

Book title: Wounded in the Church
Authors: Ray Beeson & Chris Hayward
Release date: March 14, 2017
Genre: Non-fiction

My Thoughts: I rarely read books like Wounded in the Church. Theology just doesn’t appeal to me. When the Celebrate Lit team was asking for more people to sign up for this book, though, and I saw that we would still be in America when they sent out paper copies of the book, I decided to sign up and see what this book was like.

The authors have a lot of good points. They show how people in the church can be just like anyone else. Christians should be loving and caring, right, no matter what kind of people cross their paths? Well, unfortunately, quite often Christians act in unloving ways, ending up wounding people even within the church. The authors showed quite effectively how this happens. I felt disappointed, though, that no real solutions were presented. I kept looking for advice for how to cope when you have been “wounded”, but either I overlooked it, or it wasn’t there as clearly as I had thought it would be. On the other hand, there was a chapter of common cliches Christians use, which I found quite thought-provoking. We need to be very careful what we say and how we say it. On the whole, I didn’t find this book overly helpful, although there were several points that really stood out, which I believe will be useful for the rest of my life.

The Authors’ Synopsis:

Church should be a safe place, right? Then why do so many get hurt there?

Ray Beeson and Chris Hayward combine their years of ministry experience to address head-on the elephant in the room: church members and church leaders hurt Christians. All the time. And the long-lasting effects—rejection, shame, despair, loneliness, fear—can be devastating. The authors have witnessed the rise of the “dones,” those who are just done with God thanks to scars from church.

With first-person stories of hurt and loss, this book is a wake-up call for any who deny woundedness in the church but is also a redemptive message for any who hurt from church wounds. Leaders and laypeople alike will learn how to grieve over abuse, to leave unhealthy attitudes and patterns that cause pain, and to trust in God’s real, delivering work through churches that build up, not tear down.

Thanks to the grace of God, there is always hope beyond the pain.

About the Authors:

Ray Beeson is the director of Overcomers Ministries, a teaching ministry with a special emphasis on spiritual warfare and prayer. Ray teaches seminars on spiritual warfare, prayer, and Christlike living and is the author of numerous books including Signed in His Blood (Charisma House, 2014) and The Hidden Price of Greatness (Overcomers, 2000). Ray and his wife, Linda, live in Ventura, CA.

Chris Hayward has had over thirty-six years of pastoral ministry and is currently serving as president of Cleansing Stream Ministries, a discipleship ministry that works with the local church around the world. He is also the author of God’s Cleansing Stream (Chosen Books, 2004) and The End of Rejection(Chosen Books, 2007). Chris and his wife, Karen, live in Castaic, CA.

Guest Post from Ray Beeson & Chris Hayward:

When we tell people we’ve written a book entitled “Wounded in the Church,” many nod knowingly. Sadly, the pain and heartache that happens in churches is all too common. Collectively, the two of us have spent more than 70 years in ministry. During that time we have seen neglect, tactlessness, and blatant insensitivity fostered by some leaders and congregations resulting in the wounding of others. We realize it is not prolific in every church, but the wounding is significant and it needs to be exposed. That is why we wrote this book – we share real stories of real people who were wounded in church, a place that should be a shelter of God’s love and peace. Sometimes people are abused by leaders or church members. There are also times when leaders are abused by people within the congregation. As you read, perhaps you’ll identify with some of the situations described. If so, be assured you are not alone. If you have been wounded, it is our hope and prayer God uses this book to facilitate healing. Because of Jesus Christ, there is hope beyond the pain.

Click here to purchase your copy.

Book Review—Manuscript for Murder

August 5, 2017 by NZ Filbruns Leave a Comment

About the Book

Book title: Manuscript for Murder
Author: Chautona Havig
Release date: October 13, 2012
Genre: Mystery

My Thoughts: I have always shied away from murder mysteries. As a Christian who takes literally the teachings of Jesus not to kill and the guidelines throughout the New Testament that we are not to be involved with bringing criminals to justice, but rather to leave that to the civil authorities, I’m just not comfortable reading books like that. So, Manuscript for Murder was a bit of a stretch for me. I really enjoyed it, though, and plan to read the rest of the series.

The main character of Manuscript for Murder is Alexa Hartfield, an author who writes bestselling murder mysteries. As she starts a new book, someone seems to be targeting her; she ends up in the emergency room one night. She works that incident into her book—and a few days later, someone is murdered in Fairbury in exactly the same way she described in her book! When the same thing happens a week or two later, Alexa and the police chief know that it can’t be a coincidence—but who is doing this, why, and how?

There were some things I really enjoyed about this book. In one discussion, Alexa explains to a friend why she, a Christian, writes murder mysteries. I had never thought about why people like to read murder mysteries, but the line of reasoning presented here really makes sense. I also appreciated Alexa’s attitude about clothing. She wore whatever she wanted to, no matter if it was in style or not. Her attitude is summed up in one sentence: “I wear what I like when I like, and I don’t worry about what anyone else likes or wears.” There is also some very real humor in the story; I loved the scene in which a 4-year-old told Alexa that what his mother needed for Christmas was new underwear!

In short, Manuscript for Murder is a murder mystery that I can recommend. I’m looking forward to reading more books in the series and find out if or how the relationship between Alexa and the friendly policeman Joe develops.

The Author’s Synopsis:

Alexa Hartfield. Author, local celebrity, fashion connoisseur. She chose Fairbury for its close proximity to Rockland, its small town atmosphere, and its low crime rate.

Then someone made her life a literary cliché. A mysterious accident with a light bulb sparked an interesting idea for her latest novel—and for Fairbury’s new serial killer. The first replication infuriated her. The second left an even worse taste in her mouth. The third blasted more than her self-confidence, and the fourth beat her down so far she’s considering giving up writing completely.

Who is killing Fairbury’s citizens, and furthermore, why and how are they using her novels to do it?

About the Author:

Chautona Havig lives and writes in California’s Mojave Desert with her husbnd and five of her nine children. Through her novels, she hopes to encourage Christians in their walk with Jesus.

Guest post from Chautona Havig:

How Arrows & My Obsession with Vintage Clothes Inspired Murder

A swath of fabric cut across my bedroom at an odd angle but that angle ensured that I could stretch it all out. With painstaking precision, I pinned every last piece to the fabric, disgusted at the enormous waste stretching out before me.

The pattern called for three and a half yards. I’d crammed it into two at most.

Just as I picked up the scissors for the first cut, Mom popped her head in the door to see how I was doing. I pointed out the waste. “Grandma said patterns always told you to buy way too much, but I’ve got enough to make another dress!”

Mom stepped closer. I want to say a cigarette hung from her lips, but let’s face it. No way would Mom ever allow the ashes to drop on the carpet. But it felt like one was there, nonetheless. Mom pointed. “Chautona, I don’t know anything about sewing, but I think those arrows are there for a reason.”

And with that, she turned away.

I stared down at the pattern. My arrows zig-zagged all over the place. A glance at the directions showed all arrows going exactly the same direction. Straight up and down the fabric.

You know, if I’d been doing this for the first time in 2017, I could have just zipped on over to “the Google,” as Mom calls it, and looked up why. Instead, I grabbed a thick sewing manual I’d bought for a buck at Pick-N-Save and flipped through it until I found a section on laying out patterns.

A couple of minutes later, I flew down the stairs. “The book says that the long, smooth edges are called selvages. The arrows are supposed to run parallel or the dress might hang wonky.”

Here, I can guarantee Mom took a puff of that cigarette. Man, I hated those things. “Well, like I said. I don’t know anything about sewing, but they looked important.” She blew a puff of smoke.

That’s when I suspected that Mom knew more about sewing than she’d let on.

What does this little sewing lesson have to do with mysteries and murder?

Well, see. This was a test dress. I’d only decided to learn to sew because I’d also decided that I wanted Nancy Drew’s wardrobe. In 1982, you couldn’t buy trim, neat clothing from the 50’s. I had Gunne Sax skirts and preppy tops with ruffles that my parents hated. When they found out I wanted a sewing machine to make clothes like that, they got me one.

Yep. I cut my reading teeth on Nancy Drew and didn’t stop there. I read all the youth mysteries—Bobsey Twins, Trixie Belden, Hardy Boys, Meg Duncan (she was a fave, too), and when I got a little older, Phyllis Whitney.

I loved the challenge of seeing events play out—and figuring out why. Why told me who. You get to where you can figure out things rather easily. But if you make me doubt my ideas, that’s good enough. I love that.

Is it any wonder that one of the first books I conceived was a mystery? I’d never put the ideas together until I began working on this post, but really… is it any wonder that I gave that author a love of vintage fashion? Too funny. But those arrows on that pattern? They taught me pretty cool lessons as a kid. Like Mom said:

“Those arrows are there for a reason.”

Isn’t that what God’s directional arrows in His Word are like? They’re there for a reason. They keep us from getting all wonky. It’s why Alexa writes the kind of books she does. I never could, but as she says when she describes telling someone why she writes horror/suspense,

“I tried to describe a world where we never see justice—where sin surrounds us, but the only response we see is a sweet romance or a heartwarming tale of doing good to our neighbors… And God is a God of more than love and mercy. [He’s also a God of] justice.”

Alexa writes what she does to help people sort out those crossed arrows and see that there is a point to it all—that eventually justice and mercy converge paths into one rather than criss-crossing all over the place, trampling each other. She doesn’t write Christian fiction, but I don’t know how a Christian can write fiction without some part of faith shining through. In Alexa’s, and I hope in mine as well, there’s an overarching theme that illustrates that the Lord hasn’t forgotten the people He created.

Click here to purchase your copy.

Book Review—None So Blind

June 25, 2017 by NZ Filbruns Leave a Comment

About the Book

Book title: None So Blind
Author: Chautona Havig
Release date: September 29, 2013
Genre: Contemporary

My Thoughts:

I have a new favorite among Chautona Havig’s books. I read None So Blind over last weekend, and felt like my toes were being stepped on. That’s one thing I appreciate about a book, though—when I get a lot to think about from a story that pulls me in.

None So Blind is based on quite an interesting premise. Dani Weeks wakes up one morning and can’t remember anything. She has no idea what her name is, who the person looking at her in the mirror is, or who her husband and children are. She doesn’t recognize her home, and in terror she takes off running down the street. After a couple of weeks in the hospital, where the doctors can’t find anything wrong, she comes home and the Weeks family try to rebuild their lives. As Dani learns how to live again, she tries to discover who Dani Weeks was—and hates what she finds. Taking a new nickname, Ella is a completely different person. Will she learn to love the man who claims he married her? Can she learn to love her children again? Will she ever lose her memory again?

What I liked the most about None So Blind was the picture presented of two vastly different mothers—which one am I to my children? Which one should I be? Also, which wife am I to my husband? Which one should I be? There are two very different women described in this story—in one body. The juxtaposition is fascinating—as well as the transformation of a family and home. I also loved the views of marriage that are presented. At one point I was getting downright angry with some of the characters and the advice they were giving Ella. The Biblical view of marriage came through very clearly, as well as today’s prevailing attitudes—which viewpoint would Ella accept?

This is a wonderful story for wives and mothers to read, and I ought to reread it every so often.

The Author’s Synopsis:
Dani and Ella Weeks–two women who share one thing in common. The same life, the same family, and the same body.

When Dani wakes with no knowledge of who or where she is–no memories of her life at all–David and Dani Weeks discover that “til death do us part” takes on an entirely unexpected meaning. Practically speaking, Dani died. But she didn’t.

What’s a gal to do?

In a desperate attempt to separate the old life from the new, Dani insists on a new name, a twist of her old one–Ella.

Ella’s doctors can’t explain what happened. Her children can’t understand why she doesn’t know them. David, her husband, finds himself torn between admiration for the “new” version of his wife and missing the woman he’s known for over fifteen years.

Will Ella ever regain her memory? Why does their pastor suspect it’s one great hoax?

About the Author

Chautona Havig lives and writes in California’s Mojave Desert with her husbnd and five of her nine children. Through her novels, she hopes to encourage Christians in their walk with Jesus.

Guest post from Chautona Havig

“Who are you, again?”

“I’m Joe’s, daughter. Vyonie.” My sister pointed to me. “This is Chautona.”

For some odd reason, the niece she spent the least amount of time with, Aunt Doris remembered—somewhat. But she didn’t remember Vyonie from what I could tell. She smiled at me, that amazing, sweet smile I’d never forget. She asked how I was. I always thought that Mrs. Sanderson—mother of John, Alicia, and Carl on the TV show, Little House on the Prairie—looked and sounded like Aunt Doris. Of course, that memory of me didn’t last. A minute or two later, she gave me a big smile and asked if she knew me.

It gave me a picture of what it must have been like for my character, Ella Weeks—to wake up every day with these children there—children who knew her, but she didn’t remember. The hurt she caused every time she had to struggle to admit she didn’t know something she probably should—again. So, I thought I’d ask her to tell us about it.

Ella: People often assume that the worst part of losing my memory are the memories that disappeared, too. But it’s not. A much as I’d love to remember my wedding day, my daughter’s first steps, my son’s first words, or that moment I realized I was pregnant with my third, those are blessings that I don’t think about often. No, what hurts most is seeing the pain in my children’s eyes when they need me to remember something and I can’t. For me, not remembering their first day of kindergarten is an inconvenience. For them, it’s a further reminder that if they didn’t tell me, I wouldn’t know them. That without them pushing themselves into my life, I wouldn’t care about them any more than any other human in my path. I do now, of course, but not at first. I hate that they heard David say once, “…she doesn’t know me. She doesn’t trust me. She doesn’t know our children. She tries, but she could walk out of our lives tomorrow and never miss us.”

Living so close to it every day, I missed those little bits of pain that I inflicted without meaning to, but when I went with our Bible study to a nursing home and visited with the residents, then I saw it. Women with tears running down their cheeks as loved ones patted their hands and tried to comfort. I heard one man offer to find a woman’s father. She squeezed him close and whispered, “It’s okay, Daddy. I love you. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

The man promised to try to find her father in the meantime.

Those people there—most of them didn’t realize they didn’t remember someone important. They didn’t struggle to remember this or that. Their dementia had gotten bad enough that their lives had gone from constant frustration to, by comparison, blissful oblivion.

And their families withered with each forgotten face, name, moment.

That’s what my “episode” did for my family. It caused them pain that just resurfaced every time something new happened. Pain that I didn’t know I inflicted. And since that visit, I have a greater compassion and awareness of just how amazing and powerful memories are.

I also have a greater appreciation for those beautiful words in Isaiah when the Lord promised… “I, even I, am the one who wipes out your transgressions for My own sake, And I will not remember your sins.”

You see, there’s a lifetime of the sins that Jesus died for buried somewhere in my brain—or, at least at one time there was. I know that those sins were in there, because the ones I committed yesterday are there today. The ones I’ve already confessed and been forgiven for—I beat myself up for the next morning. A week later. A month. But the Lord has wiped them clean. I just keep smearing them back out there again as if to say, “But You don’t get how BAD I was.” Yeah. The arrogance, right? Because an almighty, holy God can’t possibly understand how sinful a sinner that He had to DIE to save from those sins… is. The arrogance? That’s an understatement.

But all those years before that horrible morning… gone. Maybe I stole something. I don’t know. It was forgiven, wiped clean, and then wiped from my memory. I can’t rehash it with the Lord over and over. I can’t drag it back up like a wife who won’t let her husband forget the one time he forgot her birthday. I can’t use it as a whip to beat myself up with. And I think there’s something beautiful in that.

Do I wish I could stop hurting my family with my blank past? Of course. But am I also grateful for a living picture of the fresh start the Lord gives His people at salvation? Definitely. I hope I never take it for granted again.

Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from the publisher for my honest review, which I have given. I was not required to write a positive review and have not been compensated for it in any way. All opinions expressed are my own.

Click here to purchase your copy.